Yesterday was the last day of internship...
Im officially a qualified doctor now :)
Strange is life! Juss some yrs back, (ok ok,even some days back.hmpf!), i was soo very much waiting for this day.But now tht it was there i felt a strange sadness sweep me in.
It wasent about the 'leaving the place and having to go'.
It was just about "nostalgia" :)
As i was leaving,a friend suggested we tour the whole college and hospital one last time. and so we did! probably in an attempt to freshen up those old memories!
those memories which had long been buried somewhere deep, some surfacing up every now and then..
this time it was intentional.it was as if i wanted to gather all those moments i had spent in GMC during the entire tenure and keep them with me forever.
Sadly enough, GMC has given me memories good , bad alike...
but as they say "if u want the rainbow, u must also take the rain" :)
As i went to the academic section to collect my last pay as an intern, i saw some newly joined juniors there..."freshers" as we call thm..
The frightened faces, the anxious looks took me back in time when i started my journey in med school...
Tension, anxiety, apprehension,happiness all rolled up in one.
I remember tht first day of college, me entering the lecture hall wayy before time, going about in big groups for fear of being ragged, smiling and wishing all seniors around nervously..lol!!I was a sight, really! sigh!...but thn again all "freshers" are! ;p
We entered the "anatomy dissection hall" though my friend kept insisting tht we should'nt subject ourselves to such tortures juss for the "nostalgia" kick!
but the "nostalgia crazy" nut tht i am, finally managed to convince her (read drag her in).ARGHHHH!!!tht smell...yess the smell of formaline on the freshly preserved cadavers! gawd!!
Realising tht 4 years of staying away (i never entered anat lab once i cleared off my yr 1.i mean why wud i .its not a museum u know!:p) can do wonders to ruin the "olfactory adaptation" we once were very proud of, we took a quick final glance around the hall and turned to leave.
Tht one glance took me bak in time whn i was answerin my first anatomy viva (the first exp of ragging by a proff).i was so scared tht had forgotten all wht i'd studied .(blame it on the fact tht i was studin without a "bone set"thn).Tht voice still echoed in my ears as i left the hall...soo many yrs hadent been able to wash out the venom she had hissed tht day. Tht bitchy "u think ull be able to survive in med school?", the sarcastic smile and those silent tears all came backk in a gush!
I left the hall hoping to meet tht dame and tellin her "yess maam,i did survive it after all.but must say, u tried hard!".
Wonderin wht brought about the sudden seriousness in me, my friend nudged me and giggled as we passed the forensic dept hall.Tht almost instantly brought me bak frm whr i'd juss gone.and the next moment, we were laughin n giggling about all those fun times shared in year 2
yess, yr 2 was fun.an absolute delight...had regained my confidence by thn.was convinced tht i would definitely make it , come what may! first yr torture had shockingly rejuvenated my spirit!lol!! brought back my fighter attitude and made me a lot more comfortable with sarcasm, discouragement and unwanted taunts...in short it had just made me "shameless" ..!! , a very important prerequisite in med school.heehee!
[though admit there were a few proffs who i wont ever forget in my life (for all the right reasons).they were the only "angels" in hell , i could say and ill respect and admire thm whereever i go)
BUT yr 2 was amazing...fun is all i can remember!Had learnt the art of "fitting in", the art of answerin tests without studin, the art of giving crap with a straight face and yess most importantly the art of givin 10 buckets of muck to anyone who wud even try to throw off a single speck at me! ...:p
Yess u can say--pri changed from an angel to a devil .to be more specific a daredevil! ..heehee
As we entered the lecture halls, we saw some juniors scamperin off as soon as they saw us..."heyy cmon ppl,get a life! we r here to be friends remember?".i gave them a very irritated look as one gandhian walked past me pleadingly giving me a "gmorning maam.please , please let me go! im here to STUDY not to make friends (and definitely not to trust seniors who want to)" kinda nervous smile...
"wht was tht pri?? wht did u juss say? GET A LIFE???...u remember how u reacted whn our seniors had made one of their own classmates propose to u as a joke and u dint know wht was happening?," my so called friend reminded me! :-/ (yeah sure! i can count on my friends for noting down all my embarrassing moments and never forgettin thm.hmpf!)
"heyy cmon, tht was a bit too dramatic.it wasent even a ragging party.how in hell was i to know" i tried to defend my juvenile behaviour but in vain.i was losin this one.and i dint mind it..i smiled as i remembered how poor me was soo totally stunned ,scared as hell thinkin of all possible ways how to turn down VERY VERY POLITELY a senior intern u dont even know on the 5th day of med school while all the seniors had a good laugh at my expression!still havent figured out whethr the joke was aimed at him or me!sheesh!!.a very innovative prank i muss say! hmpf!!
later he turned out to become a very good friend who STILL often jokes about tht incident.sigh! i know i know! sad sense of humour!
As we continued checkin the benches for our scribbles n scrawls written durin boring lectures, we hoped tht they wud never change the benches for the generations to come (never paint the walls wud be too much to hope.sigh!).i couldent stop laughing as my friend started reading out some crappy verses i had scribbled on the benches (heehee was always into poetry esp during PSM class hours whn we used to have those shayari sessions whr my friends n me used to play a "rhyme without reason" jugalbandi :p)...i miss u guys :(
Next we headed to the PSM seminar room, and thn the micro lab, and the biochem lab and finally the girls common room where we used to sit n device all sorta plans and timetables (wch seldom succeeded) attemptin to study SERIOUSLY,conjured up pnemonics which cud give the writers of med books a run for their money,dozed off between classes if we got too bored of dozing off during them, and not to forget vented out our anger and frustrations by kicking chairs (plastic ones mindya--we wudent wat to hurt ourselves :p),standing on the table and screaming "------ u r a LOSSSEEERRR!" or "----- I HATTEEE YOUU " using the desired proffs names and sometimes expletives to add to the effect! *embarrassed*
yr 3 was all about clinics,case histories and tests , tests and more tests...part 1 of yr 3 was again FUN! (for the not so serious goofs like me).but part 2 was serious stuff...a question of life, careers and gettin out of here! lol!!
I personally went thru a lotta unexpected ups and downs in the latter part of yr 3, due to which my career life was a bit affected...a lot more memories, some good, some bad.but leaving thm for some other time ...some othr post maybe...
afterall u cant expect "nostalgic moments" to be summed up all at once eh?.
cos as life goes on, as each today turns into yesterday, all i have and will have are these nostalgic moments!:)
but as far as med school goes, life was ROCKKINN as soon as i learnt to deal with it! :)
and everybody learns believe me, u just gotta hold on tight!hang in there...be strong and not let ANYTHING or ANYONE affect u.
M and i walked out of college...we still had the whole hosp to go thru...but we were runnin outta time..so we decided to cover the "internship" part of it some othr time...cos internship was the best part! the BESTEST! the real life...the doctors life! the life wch we always wanted ,in a nutshell!
So we wudent be doin full justice if we juss breezed through it !(considerin we had only 15 mins with us.and we were already runnin late..had to meet up with a few friends and 5 missed calls on my cell were constantly reminding me of tht).
and thn again,i dint really need to freshen up memories of "life as an intern" as they were already freshly locked up in my (as M puts it) senti heart and mental head! .hmpf!! yeah yeah gal! u do remember birds of a feather, dontya! :p
So,with a heavy heart but one filled with memories, i paid homage to my alma mater before bidding it goodbye!
TO REIGN IN NOSTALGIC MOMENTS, WE LIVE ON!:)
MUSIC PLAYIN ON MY MIND: