May 17, 2010
life in conversation...
Its surprising how much of myself i discover during conversations with you.
random incessant conversations over cups of coffee..
those endless ventouts and sulk sessions..
discussions about the daily details of mundane life..
sometimes casual pings online when wanting to think aloud...
they bring about a change in me..a type of realisation...and the best part is these are never planned.
just a random topic of silly banter sometimes leads to hours of introspection and pondering, when im alone..
sometimes i wonder how it must be to be in your shoes..how it must be to live the way you live your life...how it must have been growing up like that, in a different environment..different place..different family..
and then i wonder if that is the reason why you think the way you do..
why is our perspective so different?
but frankly, i love listening to your perspective just as much as i love speaking about mine...i like to listen to your opinion, your interpretation, your way of looking at life.
and even though i know that i would never really choose to have your life, it still makes me ponder and want to see the world through your eyes--may it be just for a while--just enough to realise why life has shaped our personalities so different..neither good nor bad..just different.
and then again, its these small differences between you and me that make me realise my stand...make me concrete my opinion..make me love me for what i am and frankly, sometimes make me be thankful too, probably for what im not!
ahh humour?? hasn't that always been the common link?
it always helps lighten up the mood..the crazy sense of pathetic jokes filling the air with an overlying mist which always manages to get comfortable enough to hide the discomfort, brought about by differences in opinion.
and then frivolous crazy talk giving flight to unimaginable ideas--sometimes rented from the past, sometimes borrowed from the present and sometimes stolen from the near future, almost always living up to the expectation of astonishing each other with a wide spectra of diversity.
and that is probably why the differences do not cast a negative shadow..because at the end of the day we agree to disagree! (with no expectation whatsoever, of ever being able to agree to agree)
its not every time that our views differ though..and its not everyday that we have differences in perspective.
sometimes these small differences also make me realise what i need to change about myself..they help me grow as a person...help me respect change..teach me to accept diversity without being judgemental or biased about it.
conversations have always shown me different patterns in the caleidoscope of life.
some patterns made me fall in love with them..some made me look at them with contempt...some pleasantly surprised me while some became the reason of betrayal.
some showed me the good in people while some exposed me to the bad and the ugly side in them.some left me with lessons to learn from and some with regrets to ponder upon..some gifted me with precious memories to cherish while there were some which scratched old wounds and made them bleed.
strings of words thrown together in an environment of familiarity--that is all they are..so delicate and yet so powerful--these conversations!
funny is the human mind isn't it?
how it manages to catch some snippet in a random banter between two known strangers leading totally opposite lives and yet make each relate to it in a way so different that neither would ever be able to realise how it is going to affect their life ahead, will always remain a mystery to me!
and yet, if it wasn't for these honest no-pretense conversations, each day would have been nothing but a series of dreary events with everybody knowing of only one monotonous view-point to see it with...
and i wonder...what a waste it would be, this life sans conversation!!