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August 10, 2008

the story we churned...

here is the story we collectively concocted some time back in storytime2
sorry for the delay in putting it up but this time it was quite a challenge since it was stopped abruptly as noone came up with the ending on par with the deadline...
so keeping up with the rules, i get to concoct my own ending to the story (chapter 12 is my idea)...i had warned you *muhahaha*
so here goes ppl...enjoy the nonsense!!
:D

CHAPTER 1

jhanvi smiled at the reflection in the mirror---'perfect' she thought...

But very next moment it cracked and to her astonishment something cam out of that....she had assumed if ever, anything came out of her mirror, it would be her conscience
But it was the sweepstakes lucky darw coupon the mirror manufacturers had put inside the mirror about 7 long years ago as a part of their marketing campaign, hoping that people would buy and deliberately break their mirrors and then buy and break some more, just to try and win the grand prize!
But far from the thought of winning any lottery was her mind which was racing quite fast anticipating the meeting with HIM later at noon and she was proud of the fact that her slender sexy figure and pristine beauty would win HIM over!
just in the passing, she glanced at the lottery coupon, which...surprise surprise...was saying eactly what was on her mind..
CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE WON HIM!


CHAPTER 2
She could not believe her eyes!!
She wondered if someone was playing a prank....She read the scratched coupon once again, 'You won Candle nite dinner with Mr. Aaoo Kapoor'

She read the fineprint....Since Mr. Aaoo Kapur is ugly beyond description, as you might have noticed, we have deliberately arranged for a Candle 'nite'' dinner instead of a candle-light dinner, which has the speciality that none of the candles will be lit.
She immediately called her best friend who knew Mr. Aaoo Kapoor's secretary.
But the best friend was out of earshot.

She panicked and decided that she would feign fever. For that, she stuck an onion into her armpit.She actually got the fever, fell asleep and started getting hallucinatory dreams where her school chemistry teacher was asking her oral exam questions about negative and positive ions and she was continuously answering 'cation, 'anion' but it turned out the answer inside her teacher's mind was onion!

CHAPTER 3
Fearing deadly punishment jhanvi rushed out of the class only to find herself chased by a 'stupid' looking dinosaur that seemed hell bent on scotching any sort of sanity that might exist in jhanvi's world.

The Dino Had a 3d web 2.0 Glaze Mirror reflection inside its eye... and jhanvi was soon Mesmerized into those electromagnetic Eyes of dino deep inside.....Jhanvi Smiled at the reflection.. Perfect she thought.... this time... the Eye ( Mirror Refelecting Effect ) isnt cracking anymore to get some kapoors out... instead shes pulled inside the Dinos Eye... and now shes travelling inside the retina... she could feel the Quantum Flames ignited in there.. Jhanvi Thought that this is her last Hours of life ... and got nostalgic to know how her life had been treating her... Jhanvi goes Nostalgic

CHAPTER 4
she thought for a moment, "what the hell had happened to me?"
It was then she saw him coming...He looked as ugly as ever.

She was looking at her own Reflection........ but the reflected image had Aura of Male Gender... she was horrified to see her reflection as a male "as ugly as ever".... the reflection was Jhanv(i)ar... the new herself was nicknamed jhanvar...this is how Jhanvi meets Her own Ugly side Jhanvar

CHAPTER 5
She gave out a loud scream and woke up from her dream to find her astounded mother by her side.........................
Jhanvi was relieved to know that all this was a dream... she got up... kissed her mother... and headed towards kitchen .. she Opened the fridge had some water... sat on the dinning table... and shooked her head for all that was a dream....

Jhanvi then laughed at herself... went to the bathroom she was searching for mouthwash.... while doing so... she noticed herself in the mirror... and then tweaking her tongue out..Jhanvi Smiled at the reflection.. Perfect she thought.... this time... she kept teasing her reflection in the mirror by uttering " Jhanv(i)ar Jhanvar...

She kept saying it... and her voice echoed... Jhanvi jhanvi... The shrilled resonance had her hair raised... and she found that the reflection in the mirror was actually ecohing ... Jhanvar jhanvar.... while she was saying jhanvi jhanvi......

CHAPTER 6
She quelled that voices. It was an act of supreme meditation. But she hadn't forgotten about that date yet and didn't want it to be turning ugly like her dream.
She got heart attack and died.And after two decade she born in zimbabwe.Again she could not bear the inflation and got heart attack but survived.
but then she came to read nostalgic moments
and suffered another heart attack!
she couldnt survive this time

but she had to....she had to survive...for rahul..................

CHAPTER 7
..Rahul her best friend who had run away with Aditi....

While Reading Nostalgic Moments..... She had a spin in her Mind.... the mind went into reverse actions as if flicker was Flicked from last page to the first page....all the events were flashing her mind in reverse direction
1) surviving heart Attack while reading Nostalgic Moments
2) Being Born In Zimbabwe in a Black Masai Inhabitant
3) Watching her dead body after having a heart attack
4) watching herself in bathroom mirror with voices over
5) Getting up from a dream
In The Dream...
a) Watching her own ugly self with an opposite gender Reflection Nicknamed Jhanvar
b) Inside the Dinos Retina enjoying the horriified Quantum Flames
c) Coming Out of Dinos Retina Watching Dinos Reflecting Eye
d) Fearing deadly punishment jhanvi rushing out of the class
e) Chemistry Teachers Oral Exam
f) Onions Anion Cation
g) Having Fever
h) Calling Best Friend ( Aaoo Kapoors Secretary)Candle nite Dinner
i) Winning Note on a Scratched Coupun
j) cracking of Mirror
k) Beliving that conscience would Come out of her Mirror
l) Jhanvi Smiled at the reflection.. Perfect she thought.... this time
M) Left Withdrawing Support Loksabha decided to be on Floor Nuclear deal takes centre Stage With Mayawati As a Probabale
The Mind kept Spinning in revrse Gear....In The Dream...

Suddenly Jhanvi realised that the stars (read: all the above star commentors above, who have made a big discontinuous mess of a story)had messed with her life horribly and she felt this intense desire..to break free..to break free from this story..to break free of this life the stars were governing...in fact, to break free from web 2.0 itself...so she went for the last resort and said,"Parle-G 'Shakti'man, help!!!!!!"
But no one came .. she screamed one more time ..

CHAPTER 8
....and lo and behold...there stood rahul in a brand new 'shaktimaan' avtaar carrying Aditi, Jhanvi sweet little cat
(Backdrop playing Kabhi kabhi Aditi Zindagi ..)

suddenly the sky is covered with dark clouds....and a bolt of lightening flashes across the sky asif dividing it into two pieces..........as the clock in the livingroom strikes 12...........................
There, lo and behold, outside at her front door are 12 VERY handsome young men waiting for her.
But it did not matter cos the door was locked, as she and rahul were now vacationing in Honolulu, where rahul had instantly transported her to, with one 'shaktiman swrirl'

CHAPTER 9
Jhani Is PREGNANT :O ..... While on Vacation at honolulu the news breaks... rahul looses trust as he knows he cant be the one for whom shes got pregnant ... so like millions Of Radiance Bursting out of the Sun.... he asks Jhanvi

" Bol Is Bacchey Ka Baap Kaun Hain"

Jhaanvi proclaims that she does not know and suspects that it was an alien that impregnated her while she was asleep.
Jhanvi... Instead Shouts Back at rahul..screams at him for the first time in the life.... and asks her what is all this going... she says she isnt aware even of... who the mother of child thats forming inside her...

Rahul is terrorised by jhanvis reaction... and he readily remembers what the respected member of parliament "Govinda" had said in his film.... " IT HAPPENS ONLY IN INDIA".....

remembering this... he remembers that he needs to watch DD Live as the Debate is going on in the parliament... he tells jhanvi... that its crucial time.. for her and him to know... who exactly the mom and dad are of the child from whom jhanvi is pregnant and they both decide to track them on DD Live parliament debate... they know Parent to the child must be from These Member of parliament... and they get tuned to Loksabha Floor where Rahul Gandhi was speaking of how Important the Nuclear(Nucleas) is to vidharba....
But jhanvi is very patriotic, so she says "Isme mere parliament ko beechmein mat lao", just like in a heated argument or fight, some people say "Isme mere baapko beechmein mat la, mere se baat kar"

(Actually she said this because of the sheer boringness of bringing the parliament in this whole story)

CHAPTER 10
Jhanvi Reacts to this... and questions

Kya Fark hain mujhmein aur Desh ki parliament
Parliament ko bar bar Vote of confidence prove karna padta hain.. Aur mujhey apni vafadari
Parliament Mein shor hota hain.... aur mujhmein Log Bore hotey hain
Parliament bar bar Marti neta key haath sey.... aur mein heart attck sey
Parliament mein iski topi uskey sar... aur mujhmein uska baccha merey ghar

Rahul... tum hi kaho mein kya karooon.... rahul tumharey papa ney desh ko italian maa di hain..... tum desh ko Zimbabwe ki Dulhaan do... Rahulll Mujhsey Shadi karogey ???????

CHAPTER 11
rahul is shocked...whatever happened to his shy friend jhanvi---he wonders....
is it really her??
and then was it love that they shared or was it just friendship----rahul dosent know how to react......

Since Rahul has no idea how to react ... so he sings a song.....
u: main to aarti utaaruun re santoshi maata ki - 2
jaya jaya santoshi maata jaya jaya maan - 2
with few juniour artist acrobat-ing and running around.behind rahul and jhanvi.. and virtual jhanvi in various western outfit ( @ of 1 dress per minute and per location) some times in kashmir... sometimes in goa... sometimes in Iraq... and finally in Somalia... where rahul flaunts, flirts and fusses around with jhanvi...... while rahul was dreaming all this... ..

CHAPTER 12
There Enteres suddenly 'Aditi' (introduced earlier as jhanvis cat)...one meow is all it takes for jhanvi to realise what a fool shes been....she has been in love with someone who had walked away with the only emotional support she had...the one being that was with her since her birth...the gift her grandmother had given her mom on her dying bed...her mewing friend---aditi!
realisation dawns over jhanvi as she goes to rahul and slaps him hard on the face...

the sound of the slap resonates in rahuls ears and before he can come back to his senses, jhanvi walks away with aditi trotting beside her....never to look back again......
(****the song 'kabhi kabhi aditi' plays softly in the background****)


THE END!! ;)